The Characters Of Bubba Ho-Tep (and maybe Bubba Nosferatu)
Bubba Ho-Tep wasn't really a monster movie, it was a character movie. We followed the lives of several withered guys in a crappy retirement home in Texas. Who was there and what do we know about them? Let's find out. What's the likelihood of these characters appearing Bubba Nosferatu if it gets made? We'll consider this too.
Elvis Presley - The star of the show, the man of the hour! In Bubba Ho-Tep we follow the life of Elvis for a few days as he festers away in a lousy Care Home in East Texas. Elvis tells us about how he ended up there as the movie continues.
The story runs that after years of ruling the world as 'The King'. The ending of his relationship with Priscilla, the drugs, the booze and the superstardom all became too much for him. He longed for the simple life of his early days. He tells how he sought out the best Elvis impersonator he could and swapped places with him. Elvis and Sebastian Haff swapped simple contracts in secret, if Elvis ever wanted to get back his old life he could. A freak barbecue accident burned the contract, but it didn't matter Elvis didn't really want his life back at that time. When Elvis doppelganger Sebastian Haff dies, our hero is stuck to live the simple life for the rest of his days.
The movie covers the plight of old, fat and unwell Elvis and the rest of the feeble residents of the Muddy Creek Rest Home as they are tracked by an ancient Egyptian soul sucker. Freaky!
Sebastian Haff - Truly a professional Elvis impersonator, one of the best of the best. When the real Elvis arrives to meet him (early on in Bubba Ho-Tep), he drops to one knee and worships his idol. He steps up and does his duty, he takes over as the real life Elvis. We don't find out too much about Sebastian Haff, but we do know that he likes pie and that Elvis first meets him in Nacogdoches, Texas. We also know that he likes the drugs and the booze, but that's about it.
Will we see Sebastian again now that Bubba Ho-Tep is over? There is some evidence to say that we will. The very end of the end credits of Bubba Ho-Tep states that 'Elvis will return in Bubba Nosferatu: Curse of the She-Vampires starring Sebastian Haff. Will the sequel be set after Elvis has switched places with Sebastian Haff? This would really make it a story with Sebastian as the lead character instead of Elvis himself. I guess we'll see...
Jack 'JFK' Kennedy - JFK was a white guy right? Well when old Elvis meets Jack he is an old black man rotting away in the same retirement home in Mud Creek, Texas. He has a scar on the back of his head which he says is where the government took part of his brain. That part of his brain is still sitting somewhere in Washington DC. He believes that that day in Dallas in 1963 was a set up to get him out of the way. He tells Elvis that they 'dyed' his skin to hide the truth. Is he telling the truth or not? Who can tell? His room in the retirement home is filled with pictures, models and other stuff relating to his supposed assassination in Dallas. Pictures of Lee Harvey Oswald, Jack Ruby and Jackie Kennedy are on the walls. He has a great room and so he must be pretty well taken care of (especially in comparison to Elvis' room).
They have both been at the retirement home for a while. JFK has kept his distance from Elvis because he always believed that Elvis was part of the conspiracy. Once they have got past this they become quite the dynamic duo. They work together to figure out what 'Bubba' is up to. They investigate the situation. It makes them both feel younger. By the end of the movie they are great friends.
What are the odds of seeing Jack Kennedy in Bubba Nosferatu? Pretty low. Bubba Nosferatu is a prequel to Bubba Ho-Tep and seeing as they had never really met before the retirement home, so the likelihood of their paths crossing in Louisiana earlier on in life is pretty slim. Enjoy JFK's character in Bubba Ho-Tep while you can!
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